Buckley Blog Bits – August 29, 2016

I’m just rambling with some random thoughts here today, after enjoying a great weekend in Toronto watching the Blue Jays, as well as reading a bit…

  • Don’t Procrastinate and Wait Til Next Time: I used to say “I’ll do it next time” a lot in regards to fun things I wanted to do because I was in a rush to get somewhere else, but I decided to stop doing that and just do something when I want to even if it means I might be a few minutes late for my next destination, and it feels great to do that. For example, the harbor area near the arena and ballpark in Buffalo has been very nicely re-developed lately, so I had wanted to go for a walk and just sit and watch the water for a while (lots of psychology books discuss the relaxing feeling you get from watching water), so after a recent Bisons game I decided to head down to the harbor, sit down, and just allow myself to relax for a little while. Sure, I got home a few minutes later than I originally planned on, but what was I really going to do at home with those “extra” 15 minutes or so? This works into the idea of jam packing my schedule that I discussed in a recent article, and maximizing the most of my time every day to live my life to the fullest.  Another example is that I decided to stop in Batavia and go to the Muckdogs’ game on the way home from Toronto over the weekend, just because I felt like it instead of making myself wait until another time to go to a game there.  So maximize the opportunity and do as much as you can in as little of you can, instead of making yourself wait “until next time.”
  • You Don’t Necessarily Fail at Goals: If you don’t reach your goal by your deadline, did you really fail at it? I doubt it. You still did a better job than you would’ve had you not had the goal in the first place, plus you can just extend your deadline by a little bit in order to hit that goal you’re seeking to achieve.  For example, I would’ve liked to finish my undergraduate degree in four years, but I did it in four and a half.  Did I fail at the goal because I didn’t achieve it in my ideal timeframe? Not really, because I still finished my degree, it just took me a few months longer than I would’ve preferred.
  • Keep a Journal: You don’t necessarily need to blog about it (this isn’t even all my thoughts, these are just the ones I choose to disclose publicly because I think they can help others see things from a new perspective) but writing things down can be beneficial. Personally, my mind races a lot and I have this strange paranoia about “losing” my thoughts, which is why I write a lot of them down.  I practically never even go back to read any of my random assortment of thoughts (to be honest, I actually hate re-reading old thoughts), but I enjoy the peace of mind I obtain by writing them down if I need to come back to them.
  • Acquiring Confidence: Confidence doesn’t just show up spontaneously. You have to earn it, by acting the way you’d like to behave, and by practicing the skills that you want to be good at, whether it’s a skill at a sport, or improving your social skills.  For example, I had no clue what I was doing when I first started playing park golf, and was pretty self-conscious when I shot a +6 the first time I ever played it.  But over time, I’ve played the game more frequently and gotten better at it and now I’m pretty confident in my skillset, all while I’m striving to beat my new personal best score of a -6.
  • There’s Always Another Level: Simply put, no matter how good you are at something already, you can ALWAYS get better. So my focus has always been on widening the gap between the person I am right now at this moment, and who I was in the past, whether it’s who I was yesterday, last week, last year, or even 10 years ago.
  • Balance: So…how do you balance staying positive, being a realist, while allowing negative thoughts, and refraining from being arrogant when you do something super awesome while remaining upbeat after being labeled as a failure when you don’t reach that goal on time even though you’re pretty good at something else already and are trying to be happy with where you are now while still striving to be even better? Great question. Isn’t life awesome like that?

So in conclusion here, keep these key points in mind:

  • Maximize the opportunity and enjoy yourself as much as you can
  • You don’t really fail at goals, even if you don’t fully accomplish what you want to
  • Write your thoughts down because it’s just easier to let go of them, and it allows your brain to filter the unwanted crap out of it
  • Not everything is universal. What works for me isn’t guaranteed to work for you, and what works for you isn’t guaranteed to work for me.  It’s your life.
  • Confidence doesn’t just appear spontaneously. You have to earn it through practice and acquiring your desired skill set.
  • Always strive for the next level. That doesn’t mean you can’t take satisfaction in where you are now, but always be motivated to top your personal best.
  • Focus on the present. Pretty much, it’s great to have future goals and I encourage that, but keep in mind that life can change in an instant (I’m not looking to provide you with more anxiety, but it’s true) so take advantage of where you are right now and keep your focus more on the “now” than the “then.”
  • Balance yourself out. Pretty much, stay positive while being a realist while you allow negative thoughts to flow through your mind on occasion while remaining to be upbeat because nothing is rarely ever “that bad.”
  • You don’t live once, you live everyday.  So keep that in mind.

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